Earwash

Episode 90 - New Year, Old Resolutions

In the final Earwash of 2024 we check in with the regulars about how their New Year Resolutions for 2024 worked out. Who has achieved them? Who has failed to achieve them? Who didn't bother because he considers such petty matters as the Gregorian calendar beneath him? Listen and find out...

Episode 89 - An Offer You Can't Refuse

In this week's episode (not that weeks have any meaning any more; time is an illusion as far as Earwash release schedules are concerned), Douglas finds out the unpalatable truth behind the sudden appearance of many dead insects around his home. Is it anything to do with the adorable four-legged friend who sleeps on the end of his bed? Listen and find out, although the fact that that rhetorical question was posed at all implies that it is something to do with the cat. But please listen anyway.

Episode 88 - The XXXmas Album

Just when you thought 2024 had no more unexpected surprises to give, another one falls out of this year's Chirstmas stocking - an unexpected and largely uncalled-for Christmas album from Jonathan Crepuscular. Have as merry a Christmas as is possible in the circumstances.

Episode 87 - Non-Stop Nut November

In an episode much delayed due to the guest's unexpected admission to hospital, we hear from Jonathan Crepuscular about his one-man stand against toxic masculinity and unique response to the troubling social tend of 'No Nut November'. Please do not try it at home. Or in public, you'll get arrested.

Episode 86 - I Don't Know What I'm Doing But I Do It Very Well

It's time once again for our semi-regular dip into the obscene stream of consciousness that is Douglas's notebook. Marvel at such concepts as a door-to-door door salesman, secret nostrils and cheese magic, and wonder how Douglas came to write them down. Douglas wonders too...

Episode 85 - The Bonfire of the Vanity Kits

In an incendiary eighty-fifth episode, omni-critic Horace Perrault joins us in our high-tech temporary recording studio/pillow fort in Shepparton to bring his unique brand of critique to a seemingly innocuous toiletry item. Please do not try to make your own post-modern statement of critical analysis through the medium of fire - Mr Perrault is a highly trained professional and knows what he is doing (probably).

Episode 84 - You'll Need a Big Hat

In a (slightly late) International Men's Day episode, Douglas speaks to country music star Bruce Plank about how to be a good bloke. How do reforesting Tasmania, koala cuddles and exploding eagles relate to positive masculinity? Listen and find out.

Episode 83 - Make Foots Cray Great Again

In a month already full of unexpected election results, this week's Earwash brings you another - the outcome of the Footscray (or should that be Foots Cray?) school board election. I'm going to go out on a limb and say the unexpected result will cause as many controversial outcomes as other, more highly publicised recent elections.

Episode 82 - Two Ounces of Human Juice

As the news this week is likely to have caused considerable stress and tension, this week Earwash presents a soothing audio balm of Douglas's notebook nonsense. Pour yourself a glass of human juice, find somewhere confortable to lie down, press play on this episode, and let your sphincters unclench. All your sphincters.

Episode 81 - Trumpy Pumpy

Just when you thought the American elections couldn't throw up any more weirdness, out comes this week's episode of Earwash, contains an excerpt from eroticist Jonathan Crepuscular's new novel, Trumpy Pumpy. In an election season that's been full of outrageous soundbites, I can guarantee that there's some new and outrageous ones in this episode