Earwash
”Earwash”, the palate cleansing podcast. Refresh your ears with an invigorating five minutes of the aural equivalent of a thorough shampooing
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Episodes

Jul 6, 2025
Jul 6, 2025
4 min
This week we are joined by omni-critic Horace Perrault, who has experienced some rather unusual symptoms of COVID

Jun 29, 2025
Jun 29, 2025
4 min
In an attempt to counteract the ongoing bleakness of the world, this week's Earwash is excerpts of nonsense from Douglas's notebook. If you squint your ears and turn your head just so, some of it could almost sound profound.

Jun 22, 2025
Jun 22, 2025
7 min
Brought to dire financial need by the cost of unclogging a cat's crystal-ridden bladder, Earwash for the first time contains *shuddder* an advertisement. But what is it an ad for? Why did a sinister man with a sinister accent give Douglas the ad on a cassette tape? And why did this entire transaction take place on the platform at Ringwood station? Onle one of these can be answered - it's an ad for a board game called Scoffton, and it can be found here: https://thequestsuppliers.com.au/products/scoffton#
See, capitalism doesn't have to be all bad!

Jun 16, 2025
Jun 16, 2025
3 min
Pop this week's Earwash into your ears. It's a short but juicy podcast bursting with stories of things bursting in strange and upsetting ways, guaranteed to cleanse your ears from the sound of the smell of cat wee

Jun 8, 2025
Jun 8, 2025
6 min
This week Douglas is joined by country musician Bruce Plank for a few drinks and a chat covering such topics as which athletes Bruce would turn into worms, unusual ways to celebrate Pride Month, and the secret ingredients of Bruce's homemade moonshine

Jun 1, 2025
Jun 1, 2025
4 min
In a break from Earwash's usual weirdness and filth, today's episode is almost edifying and educational: a collection of interesting words from Douglas's notebooks, recorded at different times but conjoined into the time and space of a single episode. And if you can think of a word the means 'obscene' that starts with W, please let Douglas know

May 25, 2025
May 25, 2025
7 min
In an attempt to break into the lucrative and low-cost/effort podcast genre of 'Three White Guys Talking About Nothing', this week you will hear the pilot episode of Douglas's own contribution to the form, provisionally and unfortunately titled 'Male Bondage Time'

May 22, 2025
May 22, 2025
9 min
The Earwig's been acting oddly for the last few weeks (I know he's always odd, but i mean even odder than usual), so I thought I'd bring him in for a chat. I was not prepared for his tragic tale of how six shapely legs and a trio of cerci led to his downfall. Listen and muse on the fickleness of love and silverfish

May 11, 2025
May 11, 2025
6 min
Celebrate Earwash's second birthday with a relaxed saunter through the oddities of Douglas's notebook. Definitely doesn't include any surprising details about the personal life of the new Pope

May 4, 2025
May 4, 2025
3 min
In the aftermath of the 2025 Australian Federal election, eroticist Jonathan Crepuscular joins us to share the artistic outpourings the election has inspired in him. By Jonathan's standards, it's quite wholesome


