Earwash

Episode 93 - Transubstantiation

A delve into Emergency Questions with American Jennifer Cash leads to some utterly astonishing revelations. Listen in astonishment to a tale of blood, dry skin and The Brethren of the Independent Orthodox Trinitarian Restorationist Babtist Disestablishmentarian Church of the Latter-Day Saints and Sixth Day Advent of Christ the Father the Son and the Holy Spirit of America (Midwest Chapter).

Episode 92 - Peter Dutton's Personal Phlebotomist

Douglas may not be an expert on immigration law, but he is something much better than that: a podcast host, which in today's world makes him an authority on everything whose opinion must be taken seriously, second only to billionaires in terms of weight and importance of his opinions, no matter how tenuous their connection to reality is. Therefore, in this week's episode you will discover some surprising truth about how Australia's immigration system works, and some even more surprising truths about a particular politician (who is really a very nice man and not all all litigious and nothing in this episode is true and it's all a big joke and please don't sue us😓)
 
 

Episode 91 - Happy Newt Year

Happy Newt Year! That's not a typo, 2025 is the Year of the Newt in the special Earwash zodiac that i have just invented. As is traditional for the first episode of the year (if doing something for two years in a row is sufficient for something to become a tradition), this New Year and Newt Year episode is excerpts of eccentricity from Douglas's notebook. Listen to it now, and get your Newt Year off to a wrigglingly good start!

Episode 90 - New Year, Old Resolutions

In the final Earwash of 2024 we check in with the regulars about how their New Year Resolutions for 2024 worked out. Who has achieved them? Who has failed to achieve them? Who didn't bother because he considers such petty matters as the Gregorian calendar beneath him? Listen and find out...

Episode 89 - An Offer You Can't Refuse

In this week's episode (not that weeks have any meaning any more; time is an illusion as far as Earwash release schedules are concerned), Douglas finds out the unpalatable truth behind the sudden appearance of many dead insects around his home. Is it anything to do with the adorable four-legged friend who sleeps on the end of his bed? Listen and find out, although the fact that that rhetorical question was posed at all implies that it is something to do with the cat. But please listen anyway.

Episode 88 - The XXXmas Album

Just when you thought 2024 had no more unexpected surprises to give, another one falls out of this year's Chirstmas stocking - an unexpected and largely uncalled-for Christmas album from Jonathan Crepuscular. Have as merry a Christmas as is possible in the circumstances.

Episode 87 - Non-Stop Nut November

In an episode much delayed due to the guest's unexpected admission to hospital, we hear from Jonathan Crepuscular about his one-man stand against toxic masculinity and unique response to the troubling social tend of 'No Nut November'. Please do not try it at home. Or in public, you'll get arrested.

Episode 86 - I Don't Know What I'm Doing But I Do It Very Well

It's time once again for our semi-regular dip into the obscene stream of consciousness that is Douglas's notebook. Marvel at such concepts as a door-to-door door salesman, secret nostrils and cheese magic, and wonder how Douglas came to write them down. Douglas wonders too...

Episode 85 - The Bonfire of the Vanity Kits

In an incendiary eighty-fifth episode, omni-critic Horace Perrault joins us in our high-tech temporary recording studio/pillow fort in Shepparton to bring his unique brand of critique to a seemingly innocuous toiletry item. Please do not try to make your own post-modern statement of critical analysis through the medium of fire - Mr Perrault is a highly trained professional and knows what he is doing (probably).

Episode 84 - You'll Need a Big Hat

In a (slightly late) International Men's Day episode, Douglas speaks to country music star Bruce Plank about how to be a good bloke. How do reforesting Tasmania, koala cuddles and exploding eagles relate to positive masculinity? Listen and find out.